Risking it All for Love

This week has been spent in a beautiful time of sharing about a man who changed the world in his short time on earth. Tears of sadness and tears of joy flowed freely as Curt’s beautiful name rolled effortlessly off our tongues.

This beautiful man stole our hearts... there is no doubt about that.

As I spoke with countless family and friends, one theme that seemed to come up over and over was how Curt seemed to have figured it out. A life of balanced harmony.As more and more people shared how they aspire to live their life as Curt did, it made me pause to figure out what it was that made Curt so unique, so rare, and so charismatic.

My heart pondered this as my mind replayed his easy smile and seemingly endless energy and boundless strength. I thought about our ten thousand quiet conversations we had together on the secrets of life and our understanding of what this world is all about. I thought about his huge dreams and our mile long list of goals. I thought about our life, our decisions, our huge strides we made together in such a short period of time. It was then that it hit me...

Curt had it figured out because he was not afraid to risk it all when he saw potential.

He took risks that led him to finding a beautiful wife, an awesome career, friendships that are like family, and faith that could move mountains.

He saw what he wanted and he went for it. If he was gonna risk, he was gonna risk big and that is how he figured it out.

I have realized that this is not how everyone lives their lives. Often we are so concerned with what will happen if we make the wrong choice or take the wrong path that we never experience the feeling of freedom that you get when you realize that the risk that you took led you to a place of such beauty that you never even knew it existed. God’s perfect chapter.

So often we are afraid of this kind of consequential risk. What if it doesn’t work out? What if I fail? What if I put my heart out on a limb and someone gets hurt? What if the job turns out to be unstable and I lose it all? What if I don’t have enough money? What if I take too much time off of work and don’t have vacation for when I need it? Risk comes is so many forms. We are so concerned about the consequence that we lose sight of the fact that we are not promised any more time than the present moment, and that too can change in an instant.

It seems to me that the scariest part of humanity is that so often we let the fear of the unknown stop us from living into our own individual, infinite possibilities.

When I met Curt and decided to get rid of all my stuff and move into a tent by the river, risk was an understatement. We didn’t know what we were doing and we certainly didn’t know that our love was going to be the kind of magical love that stops time. But, what we did know was that when we talked about life and listened to each others hearts, there was a freedom in knowing that we both felt like better people when the other was around. So, the tent it was and after that first act of life altering risk, our lives changed forever.

Curt lived by the principle of faith. He didn’t spend more time wondering if he was going to fail or get hurt than he did in taking action to become the man he wanted to be. 

I have to admit there are times I falter now. I wonder if perhaps I should rein it in, take a step back so as not to get hurt again. But, I know that is not how I got this beautiful life we created. I know that in order to have a big life you have to have big risk.

So often we settle for so little when God called us for so much more. God’s plan is bigger than ours. When you look around at the incredibly vast mountain ranges and perfectly formed rivers, we realize that our lives are called to be just as great. Curt, I will continue to hold true to risking it all for love. Go big or go home, baby.